on cultivating community
in big ways and small
Happy spring, everyone! The cherry blossoms are blooming, and my allergies are popping alongside them. These past few months, I’ve been fortunate to escape the dreary D.C. winter and the darkness that is politics right now by taking several trips to Florida for my sister’s pre-wedding events. A bridal shower, a bachelorette in Saint Augustine, and this week I’m heading to the Sunshine State again for her wedding in Saint Petersburg.
Last month, I had the pleasure of reading a yet-to-be-published short story at the 804 Lit Salon. It was a ton of fun to read a new piece for such a thoughtful audience of readers and authors and to meet and hear the work of new writers. Every edition of the Salon reminds me of how grateful I am to live in a city that champions creativity and has such a strong literary community built into it. The number of writers and creatives who live and work in D.C. is insane.
Community is the thing I’ve been holding onto lately. In good times, it’s easy to take for granted, but in difficult times, it’s something to seek out, to clutch at, maybe even hang onto for dear life. Community is more than just the people you surround yourself with; it’s that sense of belonging that can fade into the backdrop of everyday life. That isn’t a bad thing – it might even mean your community feels organic and is well-integrated into your life. In challenging times, like the current political chaos, the framework of community feels even more visible and real to me. It’s the thing that holds me steady and keeps me grounded amidst so much turmoil and unpredictability.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the various communities I’m part of — groups of dog people and rescue dog advocates; residents of my apartment building; the 804 Lit Salon and my women’s writing group; different networks of friends and coworkers. I’ve also been thinking about the behind-the-scenes work of building and maintaining communities. The often-invisible labor of scheduling, planning, and physically setting up events for like-minded people to come together. To those who just show up – and I admit, this is often me – it’s easy to forget about the hidden work that goes into nourishing a community.
In challenging times—both globally and personally—it’s more important than ever to come together and help our communities flourish. One way to find joy and maintain balance is by continuing to build connections. This doesn’t require grand efforts like launching an event series or starting a newsletter. It can be something as small as talking to a neighbor or fellow parent or dog parent, joining a book club, or inviting a friend to a group they might enjoy.
This past week, I did a few things that connected me to my community — and they lifted my mood and sense of hope more than I expected. I joined a session of my writing group that I’d been remiss from for several weeks. Amidst a busy season at work (resulting from said political chaos) and traveling, I’d let going to my writing group slip from my priorities. I’d forgotten how good it feels to sit in a virtual room with my writing peers and friends for a few hours, listen to their works-in-progress, and help them reflect on how to strengthen their stories. Being in their fellowship always reminds me of the joy in the writing process: how creating a story and being intentional with each element of craft is where the magic happens.
Secondly, I went on a walk with my neighbor and fellow dog-mom, a friend who used to live in the unit next to mine in our Georgetown apartment, and now happens to live a few blocks away from me. Her dog, Winston, is largely what inspired me to get my own dog. I honestly believe caring for another creature — be it a little human or a four-legged family member — is one of the best ways to stay grounded through trying times. My dog Mysa has no idea what’s going on in the context of current affairs; she lives for the joy, curiosity, and moments of playfulness in each day. She is attuned to the mood and emotions in our household and whatever energy my husband and I are giving off. Much like a human mom, I take my responsibility as her parent seriously. I want to see her happy, safe, and at ease, and that motivates me to embody this state of being. So my walk with a friend was also her walk with a friend; I could tell her time with Winston brightened her day, too, as they trotted along together, sniffing every blade of grass in Malcom X Park.
Finally, on Friday, I had a fun chat with a coworker who I discovered is also a women’s fiction author. I don’t know of anyone else at my place of work — a science nonprofit — who writes fiction, so I was excited to see her LinkedIn post a few weeks ago announcing the publication of her debut novel, Weight of A Woman. I immediately congratulated her and then messaged her: “I write fiction too,” I typed. “We’ll have to commiserate about the publishing process sometime,” I joked. Her post had mentioned her long road to getting her book out into the world (the case for so many novelists!). Chatting with her made my Friday. An instant connection. A kindred spirit who feels compelled to make up stories and share them with people! It was nice to make space for a conversation about books and characters and stories, and to add another person to the world that is my writing community.
I hope you are all taking care of yourselves. If you can, do a little something extra this week to connect with those around you.